Your Greatest Kingdom Contribution

“Your greatest contribution to the kingdom may not be something you do, but someone you raise.” – Andy Stanley

I’ve been thinking a lot lately since I first read this. I know I am only 4 months into motherhood, but I am pretty convinced that I was made for this. I chased dreams of running my own business + of going back to teaching, but over the last few weeks, I have realized that I am most fulfilled and happiest when I am just being a mom.

There’s shaming for moms who can’t wait to go back to work after maternity leave + for moms who said they would go back, but decide to stay at home with their babies instead + for ones who stay at home with their babies always.

There’s shaming of moms who express how they miss who they were before they were a mom + there is shaming of moms who don’t ever want to remember what life was like before they held their baby.

There’s shaming of moms who immediately want another baby (wow, its so soon + your first born wont get enough attention) and there’s shaming of moms who don’t want another baby (because won’t your only child get lonely?).

Why? Why are we so stuck on shaming moms for their choices about raising their babies and how/why they do it? THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF RAISING OUR BABIES IS THAT WE LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALLY. The rest can fall by the wayside as far as I’m concerned.

Anyways, off soapbox + back to how this all ties into the quote that I started with — we only have 18 years to raise these babies. Now, I know I’m 30 years old and my mama is still one of the first calls I make after a bad day, but she’s no longer the primary influence in my life. I have to make decisions that are best for me and Josh and now Ryder. So I basically have 18 years to raise Ryder to the best of my ability.

You want to know my number one priority in raising him? For him to love Jesus.

There are a ton of other things that I am aiming for — for him to be a gentleman + a family man + athletic + kind + humble. For him to love his mama and still want to hug me when he comes home from college. For him to be a good example to his younger cousins + siblings. For him to love to throw the football with his dad + to help his mom in the kitchen. There are things I dream about doing with him when he’s older, but all of that pales in comparison to making sure he loves Jesus.

That’s why I stepped back from the hustle of the online business. That’s why I stepped away from teaching for the time being. That’s why I spend SO SO much of my time with my son. Because I want to spend my waking moments pouring the love of Jesus into Him so that’s what he knows best.

So my nightly prayer is that I do just what Andy Stanley says — that my greatest contribution to the kingdom is the son I am raising. That everywhere he goes, he points those around him to Jesus. That my greatest contribution is greater than a job, a career, a house, my financial status, or IG follower count. My greatest contribution to the kingdom, I pray, is a son who picks up when I leave this earth with my mission to point others to the Creator.

XO, Hil

Babes + Beach Days

I recently went to the beach with Ryder (4 months old). We went to a super popular beach (Siesta Key, Florida) and there was such a variety of parents/preparedness for baby beach days there. It made me think about there isn’t really a right or wrong when it comes to being prepared for the beach, but there are a few necessities. I compiled a list of the things I think are important for a beach day, then gave some recommendations as to different options for some. So without further ado —

Beach Day Must Haves —

  • swimsuit (I recommend one with a rash guard or with SPF in it + a hat, too)
  • sunscreen (THINKbaby + badger are two of my favorite CLEAN sunscreens)
  • swim diaper (if your babe is going in the water)
  • shade of some sort (umbrella, slumber pod, stroller, tent, canopy, etc)
  • something to sleep on (towel, blanket, any of the above options)
  • portable fan (especially if you are coming to Florida in the summer — it gets HOT)

I linked some of my favorites of the above here with links for you!

Click here to shop this picture

Any questions about my beach day or recommendations for yours? Let’s chat in the comments!

XO, Hil

Four Months with Ryder

Since this is my blog, I want to use it to document the really great things we do with our sweet babe & the areas where we are growing. I want to leave advice to myself & to other mamas, too. So this will probably be a rambling blog that will pop up once a month with a little recap of the month and how our babe grew.

In Ryder’s fourth month of life, he enjoyed many firsts —

  • he visited Auntie Bri in Tampa & saw her apartment 
  • he went to his first pool party & loved swimming with his Papa 
  • he danced the night away at his Aunt Hannah & Zio’s wedding 
  • he fell in love with picnic park dates with his mama 
  • he had his first overnight stay at Grammy & Papas (while his parents had wedding festivities) + took a bottle the whole time 
  • went with mama on their first solo road trip to meet Charli
  • Celebrated mamas 30th birthday at top golf 
  • First camping trip with his great grandparents (first golf cart + first boat ride included) 
  • went blueberry picking 
  • had his first beach day 
  • went to a princess party 
  • tried purées for the first time 
  • attended his first worship night + got to see his Uncle Armand play 

Can’t believe he’s already been around for a whole four months. Can’t wait to update you soon. Follow along on our daily journey over on IG!

Xoxo,

Hil

Target dress + shoe sale

Ready for a new spring look? Target is pulling out all the stops with their sales this week! 20% off all dresses + BOGO 50% off shoes. There are some adorable options that I am sharing below!

Tap the photo above to shop shoes
Tap the photo above to shop the dress sale

As always, if you choose to shop my links, I make a small commission to help me continue to provide this blog + to stay home with my baby boy. Thank you for supporting my family. It means the world to us.

XO, Hil

30 Things I’ve Learned in my 30 Years

It’s MY BIRTHDAYYYYY! I’ve been trying to come up with an appropriate post for my birthday — something super important to me to share with y’all. I had a hard time thinking of something, but I came up with this — 30 things I have learned over the last 30 years. This list is vv random and in no real order of importance, but I wanted to share them with you anyways & hopefully you can take one solid nugget away from this list. So let’s get to it.

  1. Family over EVERYTHING. This one is very self explanatory, but it can sometimes get lost.
  2. Your marriage is 100000% worth investing in. Divorce might seem like the easier option, but don’t do it.
  3. Speaking of, date your spouse. You cannot grow in your relationship if you don’t date each other. Dates can be free (I have a whole post on this), but you still need unplugged time together.
  4. Set phone boundaries. No phones in the bedroom. No phones an hour before bed/first thing in the morning. No phones while taking a walk together. Whatever boundaries you set, stick to them.
  5. Get outside as often as you can. Go to the beach. Lay out at the pool. Take a hike. The sunshine is good for your soul.
  6. Pursue your dreams. You don’t need a 9-5 job that you work for 50 years until retirement anymore. You can work from your phone. You can do your own thing. Don’t get caught in the box of expectations.
  7. Instagram is not reality. No one has their life all together. Everyone is struggling. Put your phone down & stop scrolling.
  8. Buy the plant & then set a reminder on your phone to water them. And if they die, just dump it out and buy a new healthy plant to fill the pot. Plants make you happy. Don’t stare at a dead one. Just try again.
  9. Laundry & dishes may seem to never end, but be thankful that you have someone to share your home with.
  10. On that same note, the laundry & dishes can wait. Choose to be present and in the moment or take a dang nap if you need one. You can fold the laundry tomorrow.
  11. Having babies is a lot tougher than they make it sound in HS health class. You’ll never be ready for kids, so just start trying when you think you wouldn’t stink as a parent.
  12. Do one thing that scares you every year (at least). If your dream isn’t scary, it’s not big enough.
  13. There should be one day a week (or atleast once a month) when you don’t wake up to an alarm. Let your body wake you up naturally. Cuddle your pups. Enjoy a slow morning.
  14. Drink a lot of water. It’s good for your insides, too.
  15. Adult friendships are hard. They take a lot of work. Put in the work for those who are a blessing in your life. ACTUALLY SCHEDULE THAT LUNCH you keep chatting about. Friendship is good for the soul.
  16. You can never have too many dogs. Some days I might tell you that 3 is enough, but honestly if I had a bigger house, I wouldn’t stop adopting pups. They’re the best.
  17. You’re not as agile as you once were. Don’t try to stand on a ball to deflate it. You’ll end up with a broken elbow. Just don’t.
  18. It’s okay to say no. Say no to a toxic social situation. Say no to another drink. Say no to a questionable friendship.
  19. It’s also okay to say yes. To an opportunity that scares you. To a new relationship. To a new adventure.
  20. You don’t have to make Pinterest dinners to be a good wife. Trader Joes has bomb freezer meals that can basically pass as homemade.
  21. Don’t let other peoples opinions keep you from doing what you want to do. You’re a big girl. You can make your own decisions & your own mistakes.
  22. Move your body every day. Take a walk. Play tennis. Swing at the park. Swim a few laps. Sunshine + movement = happy body.
  23. You’re never too old to dance on TikTok. Yes, the kids will poke fun, but if you had fun making the video, that’s what matters the most.
  24. Dogs know everything. Bad day? Sick? Sad? You need a dog in your life to give you all the licks & cuddles. If you don’t have one, go to a friends house and let their puppy love on you.
  25. Buy a house if you can. Apartments are shredding money every month. But you also have to fix things when they break instead of calling your super so maybe stick with the apartment thing.
  26. You can save a lot of money if you don’t have your credit card saved on your phone. You’re too lazy to get up and get it out of your purse.
  27. Call your mom often. Or your dad. Or your grandma. I know you are an adult & you don’t have to tell them everything going on in your life, but you should. Or atleast a lot of it. It’s important to them, which should make it important to you.
  28. Be real with people. Sometimes your true life struggles can scare people away or turn them off, but honestly, we all want to feel like we aren’t alone. Share what you’re comfortable with & you will find a community of like minded individuals. This is important.
  29. No one can put in the work for you, especially when growing a business. You have to show up. You have to put in the work. It falls on you, boo.
  30. Love Jesus. When all else fails or you can’t figure out what comes next — He’s there.

XOXO,

Hil

Registry Favs for my 4 month old

I’ve been chatting with some mama’s and mama’s to be and realized that there were a handful of things I didn’t register for that I should have, or that I did register for & really never used. That being said, I figured I could compile it into a list of my favs + recommendations to share with you! I also wanted to give you a peek into what I have bought (mostly on amazon) over the past few weeks that are some of our most used things lately. So without further ado, here is a list of all the things. I will include links to everything below —

Registry Must Have Links

Nursing Favorite Links

Recent Purchase Links

Let me know if there is anything else you need recs on or want to chat about anything I shared!

XO,

Hil

Three Months with Ryder

Since this is my blog, I want to use it to document the really great things we do with our sweet babe & the areas where we are growing. I want to leave advice to myself & to other mamas, too. So this will probably be a rambling blog that will pop up once a month with a little recap of the month and how our babe grew.

In Ryder’s third month of life, he enjoyed many firsts —

  • his first plane ride (to meet lots of Michigan family) 
• his first snow day (& snow Highlights of month two:
  • his first family vacation (to the Georgia cabin of, course) 
  • hung out for 30+ miles in his ergo baby carrier 
• added 3 states to his list — Georgia, South Carolina, and North Carolina (already have Florida & Michigan) 
  • celebrated his great grandpas 75th birthday 
  • hung out with his friend Archer on a walk 
  • went house hunting with his aunts 
  • rolled over for the first time 
  • started taking a bottle (sometimes) of pumped milk so mama could have a few nights out 
  • survived daylight savings time 

Can’t believe he’s already been around for a whole three months. Can’t wait to update you soon. Follow along on our daily journey over on IG!

Xoxo,

Hil

Phone Boundary Thoughts

I hope I never become “too busy” for moments like these. 

I was chatting with a friend lately about this momhood thing and how I’ve been recently convicted that I don’t want Ryder to grow up only seen the part of my face that he can see you from behind my cell phone. Not all of what I do in a day is scrolling. I’m taking pictures of him, chatting with my mom, sisters, and friends. I’m making plans to go on coffee dates. I’m reading books, practicing my Spanish, and yes, also scrolling social media.

But lately I’ve noticed that none of those things aren’t nearly as important as this moment of me laying on a blanket at the park looking up my the pure joy on my sins face as I hold him in the air. 

I didn’t even have my phone out. I asked josh to come snap a pic to send to our parents who are all out of town. But in that moment, I was reminded that I want more moments like this. More moments when Ryder can see my whole face and look into the eyes of his mama watching him. Not from behind her phone or from a place of distraction & checking on him, but when he has my full undivided attention. 

So goal for the next 30 days — 1 hour of phone time a day + lots of full face stares at my baby boy. 

Xo, Hil

Marriage Retreats

My marriage relationship is legit one of THE MOST IMPORTANT relationships in my life (besides my relationship with Jesus). It’s not going to grow if I don’t invest in it. 

Do you get flowers if you don’t take time to plant a seed, water and fertilize it? No. 
Just like that, your relationship won’t grow if you don’t take time to nourish it from time to time. 

We try to get away together quarterly. Some times it’s a date night, sometimes it’s a trip, and other times it’s on our back porch. We do what we have to do to have real conversations about our marriage. We know how valuable this is, because we almost lost it. 

**If ya can’t travel for one, have a date night & go somewhere alone together — a park, the beach, an empty field. Bring your notebooks, cuddle up under the stars & dream together.**

So what do we chat about on these “marriage retreats?” 
• What is the high and low if the last ___ months for you? 
• How can I do a better job serving you? Loving you? What is ONE thing I can work on in the next few months to live you better? 
• When have you felt the most loved in the last ____ months? 
• What do you want to accomplish in the next __ months? How can I help you? 
• Then we check in on our goals/intentions we set at the beginning of the year. 

Two things to note — 
1. You have to go in with an attitude of humility. Pray together before you start. These questions can be tough when someone is telling you what you could be better at, but we all know we aren’t perfect so we can definitely improve in areas. It’s still tough to hear so don’t start these convos unless your heart is ready to hear & take it in without defensiveness. 
2. We don’t always ask all the questions. Sometimes we get stuck on one of them and really dive in deep there. 

Okay, your turn. Plan that marriage retreat for sometime this month with your boo 🤍

XO, Hil

Motherhood Convictions

I shared these the other day on stories, but I wanted to share them here to have a little bit more permanent place. No judgment if ya don’t agree or see it differently. Just sharing so you can hear my heart. Two things I’ve been convicted of as a mama lately —

1. Filter Free Babes: there is absolutely no reason I need to put a filter on my perfectly precious 2 month old. I’m so trained to open up IG and throw on a filter, but why? I’m fearfully & wonderfully made. I don’t need to throw on a filter to hide my exhausted eyes from a night of mommin. I don’t need a filter to hide the fact that I’m rarely wearing make up or not as tan as usual because I’m home with my babe instead of at the pool. I don’t need a filter, but my baby most definitely doesn’t need one. I don’t want him looking back at pictures from his first year or life and only find filtered photos. I want him to see the raw beauty of our first year together, not to think he looks different or “better” because of some filter I threw on him. (I know this is a stretch for a one year old boy, but wanted to make it applicable to children at any age). 

2. Best Friends: I am so so obsessed with Ryder. My phone is filled with a million photos of him smiling at me, sleeping, or doing cute things. I didn’t even know my heart was capable of loving someone I’ve only known for a few hours so so much. Meeting your baby truly is love at first sight. But Ryder isn’t my best friend. He’s my son, my first born, my pride & joy, but not my bestie. I’m so in love with him, but I’m also pretty obsessed with his dad, who is truly my best friend. I also have a small group of amazing girl friends who have walked through life with me & prayed over me through my miscarriage & pregnancy & when my marriage was a daily battle. They are some of my “best friends”, too. I know this is an unpopular opinion, but I’m his parent, not his best friend. 

If nothing else, snap a few pics of you & your babe filter free this week. You don’t have to share or post them, but I can guarantee you’ll be glad ya did later on down the road 

XO,

Hil